Personal Affirmation and Church
This is an addendum to my last post. I have always looked to churches, not Christ, as a source of affirmation. I have sought to be recognized as important within the organizational structure, particularly in playing and leading music. I guess I thought that having affirmation as a musician or even a teacher would provide a sense of self worth. My Lord has sheltered me from this. It appears that at every turn I have run into brick walls. No one has recognized my greatness…Thank God!
I am sure that my longing for affirmation within a church is not a singular event. If the truth be known, it may possibly be the driving force behind many of us when we join a local parish. Do not misunderstand me. I do believe that God uses people to bolster our self-esteem. He has made us relational at the core. Earthly relationships, when properly placed in our walk, are part of His plan. However, when, like me, people seek others solely for affirmation, the desire is never completely filled. The sense that “this is not enough” looms over like a burning blimp.
I have just been set free from this. After years of butting my head against brick walls, I finally realize that the people I idolized are human and will let me down-human affirmation fails. God is showing me that He is my all. He wants to me to have Him as my prized relationship. It has been a very painful journey, but I am looking forward to the future, to today.
